Film
Opening Screenplay
Empty
Road
The camera pans to show an empty road with a
bend. The shot is silent but the silence is suddenly interrupted by engines.
The van then drives around the corner at speed and then disappears around the
corner.
Car
Park
The van then drives into the car park and
suddenly stops. Heard inside the van is clattering and banging of items from
the back falling over.
Steve
Whilst this is happening Steve is stood
against a fence with a confused look on his face. He does however appear to be
observing the van.
STEVE (voice over to audience)
I’m Steve. I think
of myself as a businessman, though that may not be what you would call me. I do
some small things for guys who pay. So you see a couple of day’s ago I was
approached by an associate who wanted me to deliver a package for him. He also
told me that he had got some help as I would likely need it. Now every criminal
has good backup. I had, well, I had these two.
Gav
The van doors then open and Gav emerges
looking disorientated.
STEVE (Voice over to audience)
That’s Gavin. He
thinks he’s a gangster, or at least tries to look like one. Thinks he’s big
time but really the biggest crime he’s ever been a part of was when someone
nicked his car.
Gav
Whilst Steve is speaking the shot cuts to
Gav shown looking in a mirror putting on a suit and combing back his hair.
Terry
The driver’s side door then opens and Terry
gets out looking angry.
STEVE (Voice over to audience)
And that’s terry.
As you can see he’s bloody huge and not the sort you want to mess with.
Unfortunately
however what he has in strength he rather lacks in success.
Terry
The camera then cuts again like with Gav to
show a montage of Terry beating people up.
Steve
He then flicks his cigarette onto the floor
and walks towards them.
The three men then meet in the middle of the
van and the fence. Steve first looks at the two men and then at the van
GAV
Sorry we’re late,
numb nuts got us completely bloody lost.
TERRY
Well what do you
expect when I’ve got this mug sat next to me (?)
STEVE
Look it doesn’t
matter. What is that?
Steve Looking at van
GAV
That’s a van.
STEVE
I know that but
why have you got it?
GAV
You said it was a
big job so we got big equipment.
STEV
That was not meant
to be taken literally Gavin. Couldn’t you have brought something a bit more
practical rather than a sodding van?
GAV
What’s the
problem? It’s a good getaway car Steve.
STEVE
Yes that’s
correct, if the police are on bicycles.
TERRY
Well look on the
bright side, if we roll into Manchester looking like a bunch of scaffolds we
are less likely to look suspicious.
Steve
Steve begins to look impatient.
STEVE
Fine the van will
do, anyway on to more important things. This is the job.
The
Parcel
Steve removes a book sized parcel from his
jacket and passes it to Gav.
GAV
Is that it?
TERRY
Not exactly the
crown jewels are they?
STEVE
Well bigger than
yours anyway. Look does it really matter how big it is? The point is the
contents of this package is slightly illegal and so it means that it can’t just
be posted, so I have been hired, god help me, to work with you two in getting
it where it needs to be.
GAV
Ok. How illegal?
STEVE
Well put it this
way. Your mother would not be the happiest person in the world.
GAV
Well should we get
going then?
STEVE
That might be a
good idea.
Van
The three then get into the van and Steve
places the parcel on the dashboard with the title “Postal” being visible as a
reflection in the window.
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